“You be the butler since you do the cooking and the cleaning, I’ll be the Princess, Daddy will be the King, and Jack, you’ll be the Prince” says Fiona after I had set out pancakes, sausage, syrup, butter, and milk on the table for breakfast.

“Mom, you’re the best pancake maker ever” says Jack.

“Thanks guys!” I say.

Immediately I think about my obsession about getting my teaching credential and my masters in Special Education. I figured out today, whatI’ve already known, that I need to study for and take the CSET first. That will be my project once I’ve completed “20 Days in a Pandemic.”

I’ve got a blessing from so many people already, so many, I only have one important blessing left to receive.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with butlers. There’s nothing wrong with motherhood, domesticity, cooking, cleaning, being Jenny Homemaker. I love it. I love my life and my family. But being a housewife was never my goal in life. My goal has always been to help people, make art, and write. That’s been my goal since I was young. I used to want to be a art therapist, then a nurse, then a special ed teacher. I have wanted to get my teaching credential for over twenty years!!!! I took the CBEST over 20 years ago!

My mom talked me out of becoming a teacher the first time. I was working at a department store. I was an assistant manager in the boys department, on my way to become a department manager. I was also working on my portfolio to apply to graduate school in painting. My mom thought the department store job was great. She saw me as s businesswoman and encouraged me to get my MBA instead of an MFA! Which was funny, I’ve never considered myself a business person!

So on it went, my long time working retail. Once I started dating my husband I kept making art and working on my portfolio. But I quit my job and started also trying to start a family. I did not know that process would take ten years.

When Jack and Fiona were young I started thinking about my teaching credential again. But my daughters needs, studying sign language religiously, being a parent and parent advocate has taken all my time.

The day got away from me It’s 7:41 pm and my daughter still wants me to play dolls with her. I am in my closet, I snuck downstairs to change into pajamas!

Before I came down my daughter was going number two. My husband was yelling down the hall to not put too much toilet paper in the toilet. They are coming down here now, Knocking on the door. I

I have so much I want to write about today. But I can’t.