Countdown to Dad’s visit

I started reading The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls yesterday. I’ve only read the first twenty five pages, and I’m not sure if I like it. My gut reaction is I don’t like it and the story of her neglectful parents makes me mad, and so far it seems like she’s putting her dad on a pedestal. Her love for her parents is so strong even though they are terrible parents and maybe that’s how most kids are, they have unconditional love for their parents. Maybe I don’t like the story because she has so much to say about her dad and it’s hitting a nerve inside me. I have very little to say about my dad. I don’t know if I ever had blind love for my dad like Jeannette has for hers. I can’t recite many stories about him. Only that he was a sailor and taught me how to sail. He taught me to scrape barnacles off the hull and to row a dingy at night in the fog. My most intimate memory was I pooped while taking a bath with my dad, we both started laughing and thought it was super funny, I must have been around three or four years old. In Jeannette’s story her Dad Rex Walls tells the kids bedtime stories, mostly about himself she says. My dad doesn’t talk. To get him to say anything takes a lot of coaxing, and a lot of what comes out is strange and sometimes revengeful towards my mom. I don’t remember ever feeling like I loved my dad so much, I only remember being really mad at him or having no feelings about him at all. I’m not expecting much next week while he’s here. I have very few emotions at all about his visit. I texted Danny last night to see how the honoring was going at the nugget and Danny said “It’s so fucking weird!!!!!!!!”

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About Dirty Laundry Blog

Thoughts on Motherhood Through the Eyes of an Artist