Ten Minutes

I have Ten Minutes before I need to get Jack and Fiona up. That’s a lot of time. Not long enough to turn on my computer and write a long blog post, but enough time to jot down some thoughts. I worked in my studio yesterday. 

It felt great to be back after the weekend, although this time I brought my notebook to Mendocino and did some work. I felt like I was still connected to my process and my mind stayed in experimentation, exploration mode. 

Just like the babies. I let them color too, I watched the way they made their  marks. Jack forceful short lines around the edge of the paper, Fiona fluid lite marks in the center of the paper. Are we born with inherent mark making tendencies?  

Quite possibly. 

My line tends to look the same year after year no matter how much I try to change it. No matter how much I practice, it comes out the same. I had made these little drypoints one time in school, my teacher said they were child like. I got really scared, I took her words negatively and thought she was saying I wasn’t sophisticated enough. When I talked to her again, while working on some new things, I told her I was trying to not be child like. She said “why?” And explained she meant it in a good way. Sometimes I draw something or paint something and I want to cover it up right away. It makes me uncomfortable. Is it because I’m revealing myself to myself? My language? Child like and unsophisticated, still after years of art school and practice? 

Is that really me? Why do I make the same images year after year? Work on the same idea? Will I notice the same thing in Jack and Fiona? 

My Ten minutes is up plus ten!! Oh my gosh how time flies! 

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About Dirty Laundry Blog

Thoughts on Motherhood Through the Eyes of an Artist