“Mom, did you wear hearing aids when you were a baby?”

“No Fiona, I didn’t because I when I was born, I could hear. “

“I don’t want to wear hearing aids.” Fiona said. She let her head hang towards the floor. I had my head peered out the bathroom door. I wanted to make sure we didn’t miss our appointment, and when Fiona’s going to the bathroom that’s a long process. That’s the one thing I will not miss when my kids get older, waiting for them when they go to the bathroom.

“Will I hear when I get older, like you?” Fiona asked.

“No Fiona, you will only hear with hearing aids or cochlear implants.” I said.

The door is ajar and the receptionist and patients in the nuclear medicine waiting area can hear our conversation. We have been here since 10:30, the appointment was supposed to be at 10:45 but the doctor put in the wrong type of cat scan, we have to wait to get the right type of cat scan ordered, it was already after 11:00.

We had an interesting time at the hospital. We moved into the main building from the trailer and still had two E.R. patients in front of us. I felt bad for Fiona missing summer camp. I think she may have enjoyed some of the hospital visit, she mostly ate junk all day long.

I feel Fiona didn’t understand a lot of what was said today. Reading Groovicorns in the nuclear medicine waiting room was great. The conversation in the bathroom was easy understood. Once we got into the main hospital much of the time was spent with Fiona walking behind me, which we can not talk during that, she can’t hear me from that far away or with my back turned. I don’t feel like Fiona could understand much of what I said in the Cafeteria, I found the conversation very strained in there. The table was wide. I also couldn’t think of signs to use about what Fiona wanted to talk about. She was very interested in what the medical staff at the hospital were wearing. And why.

This is becoming a pattern. The same thing happened at the Audiologist. Fiona was unable to understand the medical terminology that was said, she wasn’t able to hear anything. But people were talking about her and medical things that were going to be done to her. At what point does Fiona need an interpreter at doctors’ visits? One of the things I’m going to do is make a book for us of Medical Terminology that keeps coming up and the signs, we will learn it together.

There are tons of times we can be together without using sign language, quiet, one on one conversation with a familiar subject or reading a book when it’s quiet. Anything when it’s super quiet. But most of life is spent in noisy environments. Not designed for deaf or hoh people. Explaining new vocabulary, I feel Fiona will always need sign language support. Very direct teaching.

The woman from the ADR told me not to be nervous or scared about tomorrow. That’s it’s just a relaxing conversation to collaborate on how to come up with a solution to our problem. I feel sick. I feel like I completely do not know what to expect or what to ask for. I think Fiona needs to be in a program like she was just in or something similar. Or somehow get that type of teaching in the mainstream classroom. Then Fiona needs to teach her friends sign language.