My bath water is warm, feet stick out from bubbles at the end my claw foot tub, oh I feel so guilty. It’s a drought, do I feel guilty? Or entitled to this experience?
Self care is expensive. In every which way. I’m sorry drought and earth. I’s sorry people who are suffering and dying. I tried to not watch or pay attention for three days, maybe four.
I wanted to do more. I want to do more. I’m studying the CSEt and staying true to my core.
Triggers all around. My back is sore. Am I tired? Depressed? Sick? Or?
Someone said something, the semantics were a bore.
But the words that were said meant something more.
I can’t help it if the psychic energy I encounter causes this reaction. But maybe I’m all the wiser because I can see this as real. I’m tired. I’m sore. I’m taking a bath during the worst drought since 1976 in the name of self-care.
My red nail polish is chipped. My feet need tending. Bills pile up, checks need to be sent. But my eyes sting and hurt. I felt my cheek begin to twitch. I go through the reasons:
2. Tragedy in our world
3. Something someone close to me said. A hostile body language and tone in voice.
4. A natural cycle of depression and anxiety
5. Not eating heathy enough
6. Exercising too much
7. Not stretching enough
8. Not meditating enough
9. Letting myself read the news
10. Self-care overindulgence
11. First world problems
12. This is where I shift into breath. What’s happening right now in this moment?
– bubbles popping
– water dripping
– sky blue, wind blowing, freeway humming, bones cracking, mind calming, breath slowing.