Category: doing the best i can

Lost words, When the sounds that roll out of a mouth disappear into the ether, Vocabulary disappears, I have no idea what you are saying to me, This is what I think in my mind. I stand there. I wait for something to change. For the words to be understood, For the speaker to give […]

I’m looking out at the great big blue pacific ocean. We are on our vacation, this time we headed south to Aptos. Our usual route is North to Mendocino. Its nice to be by the coast, to hear the waves crash, rumble below. I don’t want to get back into my car, I don’t want […]

Yesterday I got a shot of fresh depression. I was tired in the morning, but I went to yoga after drop off, and felt like I could have a productive, healthy day. I decided to print out all the e-mails I’ve sent the school District. I am starting my IEP file for Fiona. When I […]

Mainstreaming Fiona woke up late this morning. I woke her up, usually I put the hearing aids in her ears immediately, but this morning they were no where to be found. I looked and looked and couldn’t find them anywhere. I used my signs, bus, breakfast, shoes, socks, now, unable to make clear sentences. Barely […]

“Look Mom, this isn’t poop, it’s dried something else” Jack says. “Drop that Jack, that is definitely poop, eww, lets go wash your hands, that’s so grost, we’ll just wash your hands really good with soap and water, poop is dangerous, you can’t touch poop.” I say. We smelt and saw the poop last Friday […]

Corrosion of chalk, ink on paper, words on paper, chapters, parenthood. Everything gets corroded. You learn everything dies. You learn the air will be filled with smoke from wildfires for the rest of your life. I hear the birds chirping. I sit in my house with my living room door and windows open, not sure […]

A tea stain from a splatter on thick watercolor paper. One dark line encloses light pink, a red drip and green at the bottom is all I can see of a painting above my head on a shelf. One time I told my friend I was wanted to propose an installation piece to an arts […]