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Dirty Laundry Blog by Jennifer Hynes

  • Psychic energy and semantics

    May 13th, 2021

    https://psychology.wikia.org/wiki/Psychic_energyPsychic energy

    My bath water is warm, feet stick out from bubbles at the end my claw foot tub, oh I feel so guilty. It’s a drought, do I feel guilty? Or entitled to this experience?

    Self care is expensive. In every which way. I’m sorry drought and earth. I’s sorry people who are suffering and dying. I tried to not watch or pay attention for three days, maybe four.

    I wanted to do more. I want to do more. I’m studying the CSEt and staying true to my core.

    Triggers all around. My back is sore. Am I tired? Depressed? Sick? Or?

    Someone said something, the semantics were a bore.

    But the words that were said meant something more.

    I can’t help it if the psychic energy I encounter causes this reaction. But maybe I’m all the wiser because I can see this as real. I’m tired. I’m sore. I’m taking a bath during the worst drought since 1976 in the name of self-care.

    My red nail polish is chipped. My feet need tending. Bills pile up, checks need to be sent. But my eyes sting and hurt. I felt my cheek begin to twitch. I go through the reasons:

    1. Fatigue

    2. Tragedy in our world

    3. Something someone close to me said. A hostile body language and tone in voice.

    4. A natural cycle of depression and anxiety

    5. Not eating heathy enough

    6. Exercising too much

    7. Not stretching enough

    8. Not meditating enough

    9. Letting myself read the news

    10. Self-care overindulgence

    11. First world problems

    12. This is where I shift into breath. What’s happening right now in this moment?

    – bubbles popping

    – water dripping

    – sky blue, wind blowing, freeway humming, bones cracking, mind calming, breath slowing.

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  • Evolve

    May 11th, 2021

    Pay more, give free education no matter how old a person is so they can gain expertise in something they are passionate about, artists, writers, and other creatives get a paycheck and government healthcare, need I go on?

    https://apple.news/Ahc2fgOWmSa6Yx0cnucy3wwPay people more money!

    My answers to why there are so many vacant jobs! It people aren’t making enough money to survive its hard to convince people to go back to crappy paying jobs.

    My other solution to our dilemma in California with the drought, heat waves, fires, ripping dry winds, we need to build down! Underground with solar panels on top. Most of the living would be done underground but there would be “observation decks” that could be a studio or dining area, somewhere people enjoy natural light.

    I’m even thinking of more indoor crops. I went on an amazing adventure yesterday. To YOLO county. Its farmland. It was a dry, hot, windy day. The route traverses through the east bay freeway then you cut off before Davis through the farmlands. Most of the landscape is covered with tall dry grass, orchards, fields of Lavender, and Olive trees, there’s even pistachios growing now because they don’t mind the Boron in the water.

    On the Horizon is a mountain range, on the other side of the mountain range is Lake Berryessa. on this side the farms butt up against the base of the range. Its a dry patchy landscape with a burn scar from the fires last year.

    It was an amazing one day road trip. All I could think of was possibilities. Stories I wanted to write, food I wanted to grow, how I wanted to sit there in the shade under the big oak. For a whole day and night. There were Jack rabbits running around and groups if wild turkeys. Deer hopping and chipmunks scurrying.

    On the way home we went through Vacaville. I ate a pork Tamale and drank a sierra Nevada. The kids ate Ice Cream cones. Then zonked out on the car-ride.

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  • Mothers Day 2021

    May 9th, 2021

    Birds are chirping, sun shines, blue skies today. I sit in peace this beautiful Mothers Day. I remember so many years in a row of sadness and despair. Fear of dying young like my mom did. Sadness she was gone. Worry about my high cholesterol and my older self as I raised young babies.

    Today, for some reason those thoughts and fears have dissolved. I feel relaxed and content. It’s been 13 years since I lost my mom. I miss her so much and wish she could have met her grandchildren. I owe her everything in the making of the person I am today.

    I am thankful on this Mother’s Day for my beautiful life in this beautiful city of San Rafael. Surrounded by a wonderful community. I am thankful for my friends virtual and in person! I am thankful for my studio filled with paints and paper. I am thankful for the trail I plan to walk up this morning!

    Love to all Mothers out there on Earth and beyond. Love to our only Mother Earth may we protect you and keep you strong.

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